73. May - July 2012: Emmett, a.ka. Airport Guy

What's that saying about taking lemons and making lemonade? How about taking a five hour flight delay and getting a date out of it?

How did you meet? O'Hare airport

Name: Emmett

Height: 6'2

Age: 27

Occupation: finance

Good quotes from date:

Him: "I'm feeling really loose."  (after 3 drinks. He doesn't drink that often)

Him: "I'm so exhausted!"

Me: "Why? It's July 4th, you had off from work. Why are you so tired?"

Him: "I had a really hard-core work out at the gym today."

Me (in my head): There is no response in this world that can bore me more than this one. File away for blog post.

Why is he still single? Although sweet, he's self-absorbed and immatureHe doesn't know how to navigate the dating world: longest relationship ever = 2 months.

Did he pay for the date?

We split everything and he said how refreshing it was to date a professional woman who can pay her way. I refrained from telling him how un-refreshing it was that a professional dude can't pony up and buy a professional woman a drink.

Did he contact you after the date? Yes, via text and phone call

How many dates did you go on? 2 dates and 1 group date

Would you recommend to a friend? no


After the Delta shuttle screwed me again and cancelled my flight home due to thunderstorms (and didn't announce it at our gate, I received a text message from Delta), the guy sitting behind me and I started to complain and discuss which flight to get on next. He was in town for a bachelor party and was hungover. I was tired, dressed in a typical plane outfit (think loose everything), and had no make-up on. Five hours and many unhealthy airport snacks later, he found me at our new flight's gate and chatted me up. Got my number and 2 weeks later we went out.

Date 1:

On a rainy evening he came all the way to my neighborhood. He got a little drunk and silly. I noticed he is really tall and handsome and an excellent dresser. I like this. We shared a little smooch on the sidewalk at the end of the date. I still like this.

Date 2:

This time I went to his neighborhood and he took me to one of his favorite restaurants. I offered to split bill (like I did last time) and he accepted - again. He held my hand, cuddled with me on a bench in a park and we kissed some more. He talked about himself most of the time, the majority of which included him whining about how he didn't want to play in a soccer game later that night, but really he has to, but he doesn't want to, but if he doesn't show his team won't win, because, yeah, he's that good. I like this less and less.

Date 3 - group date

Several weeks later it's July 4th (he was out of town for 3 weeks). He called me when he got back. I needed to see him one more time to decide if there was anything between us besides my physical attraction to him. I invited him to meet my friends and I at a bar and to watch fireworks on a rooftop. The owners of the rooftop are a couple who I just met that very same night.

Aside from flirting with my blond friend the entire night and not paying for the pizza we ate, he won the prize for "most annoying date in the world". He whined about how much he wanted to see the fireworks, and guys, what if we miss them because we're eating pizza? They start at 9:20pm we better get up there....yadda, yadda, I tuned out.

Let me reiterate: we were at a friend of a  friends' home who kindly gave us booze and an invite to their rooftop. Any mature person would shut the hell up and let the hosts guide us upstairs when they are good and ready. I worried I might shove him off the roof by accident.

Once on the rooftop he whined about how the fireworks should just hurry up and end so he could go home and sleep because his day at the gym was so very tiring.


Sorry folks. I'm an adult now and no matter how hot you look in a pink buttondown shirt, I can't  keep you around if you are annoying as shit. Two days later he left me a "happy birthday" voicemail. I decided to phase him out and not respond. One week after that I got a text message asking if we can just be friends to "expand our networks" and that I should think about it. I've thought about it.

No thank you.