47.1 July 2011: Brian #3, The Makeout Factor

How did you meet? online

Name: Brian (our 1st date here)

Height: 5'8"

Age: 32

Occupation: law

Good quotes from date:  

"I'm going to get a bike just to spite you."

"After the kid barfed in the pool, it was time for me to leave."

"Who the heck is Casey Anthony?" (When I asked his legal opinion on the trial. You'd maybe have to be living under a rock to not have heard anything about her, her daughter, or her case.)


So folks, I gave this one a chance. I really did. I adhered to the 4 Man Plan and said yes to a second date. He is incredibly nice, and compassionate, and sometimes funny. He still says "fuckin" in almost every sentence. But really, let's be honest. That wouldn't matter if we had a connection. If I wanted to make out with him. If we talked about deeper things than our local subway line and the public pool in which "that kid barfed".  

If, if...we had conversations like me and Jack. This is what i thought as he chattered away. Not even Jack the person, just the chemistry I felt with Jack - whether I made it up or not. I so wanted to want to make out with Brian. Because wouldn't that make all of this easier? 

He walked me to my stoop where I executed my tried and true strategy of "hug and run." Sensing he wanted more, I went far left to avoid he lips coming at me like torpedos. I thought I was in the clear until he asked, "Can I kiss you goodnight?" 

Ladies, what does one do in this situation? As my friend says, "If they have to ask you for it, they probably shouldn't do it." Although maybe if the make out factor existed, I'd instead be writing about how endearing it was that he asked. But, no. 

So what could I say? I said "Sure!", like I wanted it because - god help me - I needed to get it over with so I could run upstairs to safety. I allowed a quick peck before I pulled away and did just that. He said he'd be in touch, but I know that is the last time I will see him. Or with my luck, we'll be on treadmills next to each other at the neighborhood gym. 


46.1 June 2011: Brian #2

Last week was the week of second dates -- second dates i was actually looking forward to -- a feat that I was beginning to think was as rare as Halley's comet and as elusive as the Chupacabra.

Second dates are confusing for me both because I can't wear my first date outfit again and I can't tell the same first date stories about myself. Also, I worry that i'm going to confuse one guy with another...especially if they're all named Brian...


How did you meet? online

Name: Brian, the artist (our 1st date here)

Height: 5'11"

Age: 37

Occupation: artist

Good quotes from date:  "So tell me about your last boyfriend. Yeah, I went there." 

I debriefed him on the runaway 3-yr ex-boyfriend who just couldn't get his shit together to move up to NYC. His ex-girlfriend from this past winter was a "crazy, control-freak who tried to change him." Why do men always call their exes crazy? It's fascinating.

Did he pay for the date? yes, unlike Jack, my crush, he doesn't hesitate to buy me a drink. He takes the money out and orders. I like this forwardness.


I played a little hard to get with guy only because I had way too many other dates scheduled last week. I waited until Friday (more than a week after our first date) to reach out and ask him to hang out again. Meanwhile if a guy i like does that to me i freak out. Yes, yes, hypocrisy.

We ended up meeting late that same night because I had a volunteer gig he was going away for two weeks the next day.  I'll admit i wanted to see again before two weeks to see if something was there.

We hit up a local bar, sat outside on the patio and had a drink. He is so easy to talk to...he is open and honest and interesting. He smiles a lot which i like. I'm still not sure we have that much in common, but our personalities are on the same wavelength. I always fall for the artist/musicians...ho hum. I'm sorry, they're just sexy.

He drove me home again in his car.  We began and ended our date with a hug. He said, "I'll call you when i get back into town." There is something about this guy that makes me believe he absolutely will.